There are those of you out there who will argue with me, but in most cases the following is true:

Real is good. Fake is bad.

I know – you’re now thinking of all the scenarios that make that previous statement untrue.

Fine. Yes, I like that fake frosting that comes on the cheap bakery cakes. Love it, actually. And fake tans, if done well, can really change a girl’s outlook on life (especially after the bakery cake incident).

But most fake stuff: hair extensions, coworkers, teeth – not good.

Same goes for fake plants.

They are bad.

Sad.

Fake.

Get rid of them. Get rid of them now. You don’t need them anymore. I swear. They just look tired and dusty and lonely and out of date. If you live in Colorado, you aren’t supposed to have a palm tree in your dining room. You aren’t fooling anyone.

Look at this miserable little thing:

Really?

Really?

Or this. I mean, honestly – frightening:

131205a

Do yourself and your house a favor and and find some flowers or greenery or branches and invite them inside. Don’t think you can afford it? You can! You can shop your own yard! Or your neighbor’s yard; the neighbor with the poor eyesight and the great lilac bush!

You, too, could have this:

courtesy of ashvilleindieweddings

courtesy of ashvilleindieweddings

And this:

courtesy of heirloom philosophy

courtesy of heirloom philosophy

And this:

courtesy of ahamoderliving

courtesy of ahamoderliving

But probably not this. Because this was taken in Botswana and as much as I wanted to sneak it home with me, it’s illegal and I would have gotten fined or shot or something:

courtesy Stephanie Blackford (aka: me)

courtesy Stephanie Blackford (aka: me)

What I’m getting at is beauty doesn’t need to be expensive, it just has to be. Go outside and find something special. And if you get caught stealing flowers from your neighbor, remind yourself that the pathetic, plastic, fake as Bravo’s Real Housewives of Atlanta plant is the real criminal here.