Need more time in your day? May I suggest stashing your toddler on top of the refrigerator? Just keep yelling "Stay COOL!" and hope your neighbors can't see through your kitchen window.

Need more time in your day? May I suggest stashing your toddler on top of the refrigerator? Just keep yelling “Stay COOL!” and hope your neighbors can’t see through your kitchen window.


I store my Christmas plates in that ridiculous cabinet above my refrigerator which begs the question Why don’t refrigerator makers make taller refrigerators? because I would much rather have more refrigerator space for important things like vegetables and boxes of cheap-but-drinkable white wine in lieu of those teeny tiny cabinets that are stuck above what I now feel is a much too short refrigerator but that’s not what this is about now is it?


What this is about is the New Year. The fresh start. The chance to do things right. The window of opportunity to put your holiday decorations away in an organized, sensible, adult fashion. The chance to throw out all of the old toys that Santa brought last year so you can find a home for the toys that Santa brought this year (tip: black Hefty bags only for this task – as well as the task of getting rid of the empty boxes of wine).

So, when I got out the dishes this year, I cleaned the top of the refrigerator. It took a total of four minutes, but I can sleep easier knowing it’s not caked in dust. The boxed wine helps me sleep too. And this new product called ZzzQuil that I am sort of obsessing over. But I digress.

I am also determined to donate or dispose of all the decorations I don’t need or want. Like the scratchy wreaths that I bought years ago and used once and the stained cloth napkins that I really believed could be salvaged with enough bleach to disinfect an olympic-sized pool and the snowman platter that always creeped me out because of what appears to be a painted-on lazy eye.

This is also the time to gather all of those envelope corners with return addresses on them and put them in your master list for next year. Also the time to make a master address list. Just saying.

This is the time to not save the gift bags and tissue paper and ribbons that have seen better days, to purchase a trunk-load of matching storage bins with lids that fit so that you can store and then stack your holiday treasures like the Type A people we secretly judge and envy in equal measure. This may be, in fact, the time for a label maker. Yes!

There is no time like the present. I’ve decided that if a task takes less than six minutes, I am committing to doing it immediately. I am betting by the end of 2015 I will no longer be forced to stash Georgia on top of the too-short refrigerator in order to accomplish a nagging chore. Because it’s wrong. And I’m worried she’s going to tell. And who has time for that?

See you next year at The Neighbor’s House!